Update on The Talk

Well, I lunched with my mom on Wednesday and we did have The Talk about my birthday and my brother and it went relatively (ha ha!) well. Nothing was really decided but it was important to me to get the issue on the table. We agreed that my brother's problems are his own and my mom offered to talk to my dad about his role the situation.

We discussed a few options:

1. Status quo. Birthday celebration on my birthday at my house. Mom talks to dad to see if that will help.
2. Birthday celebration out at a restaurant, not on my birthday. Dog Christmas on another day.
   
3. Birthday celebration at my house, not on my birthday. Dog Christmas on another day.

I don't know that it will help at all but I do feel better having had my airing of grievances, albeit not at immediately after the Festivus as tradition would dictate. (Then again, with Festivus, there are no rules!)

After sleeping on it and discussing it with DH, I suggested that we give the second option a try this year. We'll see if it sticks or not!

The Talk

I'm having lunch with my mom this week and I need to gather my thoughts for The Talk. I've been dreading it. My birthday is on December 25th which poses some problems challenges. My major issues have related to the guest list and menu.

The major challenge that I have is how to deal with my brother. He is about three years younger than I am, he is single. He is now in language school. He does not communicate with the family much at all. In fact, I have not heard from him since last December despite the fact that I have contacted him multiple times since then. He is coming to the area on December 24th and I strongly suspect it has more to do with school being closed than the fact that he wants to see any of us.

Last year, when he was at my house, he made faces at what I served for my birthday dinner and he sat and pouted. My father spent most of his time trying to get my brother out of his funk. My brother seemed to make it clear that he was there because he did not see not coming as an option, not because he wanted to be there or to celebrate my birthday. Unfortunately, this is par for the course and I really I do not care to experience this again.

What I want to talk about with my mom is options. What are some good options that will allow me to celebrate my birthday -- preferably on my birthday -- and not have to deal with my pouting brother.

It would be very helpful if I could figure out what I wanted from all of this. As it stands now, I don't see a way for everyone to be happy.

Any brilliant ideas out there?

Mom's birthday festivus

Last night we met my parents at Border's for a coffee. We gave my mom an early birthday gift while we were there. I picked up a nice piece from King's Pottery in Seagrove after I finished the Rolling in Randolph ride last month. The other part of her gift, a Carolina Hurricane's game, is on Friday.



Happy birthday Mom!

Assisted Living...

(imported from FB)

5:40pm Tuesday, Jun 26

I had lunch with my mom today she gave me the update on grandma, among other things.

Apparently my grandmother is going into an assisted living facility. She thought that she had Alzheimer's Disease but we think that it may be more of a generalized forgetfulness than that. She has left the door open several times, left the gas burner on stove, gets out of cars and walks away as if the door will close itself.

The icing on the cake was probably her drier. She called my mom last week and said that her drier was broken. She had washed and dried one load and when she put the second one in, it malfunctioned. She called the repairman. My mother offered to go over and take a look and my grandmother said that she had it under control, the appointment had been made and so on. Well, the repairman came a week latter. As you can probably guess, she had not turned it on.

After that, she started to say that she had Alzheimer's. She has made some indications that she would like to move to one of the two assisted living facilities in her neighborhood. This is good news in a way. A year ago, after she broke her foot and refused to do the rehabilitation exercises that they wanted her to do, she was wailing,"You're just going to put me in a home."

Speaking of Father's Day, I have a Mother's Day story to share

This falls under the category of "Shoot me if I ever get this way..."

My mother shared a story about my grandmother with me. My grandmother has four children, Aunt Patty in France, Uncle Joe in NJ, Uncle Phil in Atlanta and, of course, my mom.

My mom called and asked my grandmother how her week had been going.

"Well, it has been just awful. First I got a package of handmade cards from Atlanta. Who would give an old woman cards?! What I am going to do with them. And there was some home made card signed by the kids (yes, the kids would be her three grandchildren in Atlanta).

"Then, I got my Harry and David. But it was the wrong one. I cannot believe that they ordered me the wrong one. It was supposed to have sausage and cheese in it. (from Joe)

"The next day, I got some tulips in a round vase. The flowers are half dead and who would put tulips in a round vase? I had to go all around my apartment to find a vase to put them in. (from my aunt)

(my mom asked my grandmother what she wanted earlier and they went to the farmer's market to get some geraniums for grandma's deck as a
result)

My grandmother then said something to the effect of "I guess I
shouldn't be like that."

My mom took that as an opening and replied that maybe people shouldn't send her gifts anymore since it was clearly upsetting her. I think that my grandmother was in a bit of a snit for a while after that.